Who's who (and what) in your family?

My five year old just asked me:  "Do I have two dads?"

This question really surprised me, as the only man in my life is my spouse -- the father to all 4 of my children. I responded with, "Why do you ask?"

"Well, who is Poppy?  Who's Daddy is he? "

My heart sunk. Poppy... well, he's my dad, my adoptive dad, but now he avoids me and no longer comes to visit me and my very young children.

I never know how to discuss my adoption and my dysfunctional adoptive family with my kids... especially since there is a history of abuse and rejection my kids know nothing about.

It's difficult being the adoptee who got removed and rejected by two sets of parents and four sets of extended families.

Are there any other adult adoptees - rejected by adoptive family members - who struggle with this "who is your mommy and daddy... and who are my grandparents" conversation with your own children?