Adoptivfamilie bryder tavshed: Vi vil have Amy tilbage
Næstved - 14. juni 2012 06:00
Af ANNA C. MØHL
Sjællandske har talt med Oxana og Kenneth Steen, der i 2009 adopterede to piger i Etiopien. Den ældste pige, Amy, er nu anbragt på et opholdssted. Forældrene arbejder på at få genopbygget Amys tillid til dem. De lover aldrig at svigte Amy igen.
Det skriver Sjællandske.
- Der er intet vi ønsker mere brændende, end at få Amy tilbage til vores familie.
Oxana og Kenneth Steen står for første gang frem i offentligheden og fortæller deres version af, hvad der førte til tvangsfjernelsen af deres datter Amy. Parret arbejder tæt sammen med Næstved Kommune og opholdsstedet Arken, hvor 12-årige Amy er anbragt, på langtsomt at genopbygge tillidsforholdet, så pigen engang kan komme tilbage til sine forældre og lillesøsteren Isabella.
-Vi elsker Amy og vi kæmper for hende, siger Kenneth Steen til Sjællandske.
Parret har i flere måneder følt sig hængt ud som elendige forældre, der hentede et barn i Etiopien og efterfølgende fik pigen anbragt hos en plejefamilie. Sagen om Amy har vakt enorm vrede i hele landet. Det var især en videooptagelse af en voldsom flytning fra pigens plejefamilie til et hemmeligt sommerhus, der har skabt harme og debat om børns rettigheder.
Truede med selvmord
Amy kom til Danmark fra Etiopien med sin lillesøster i 2009. Der gik ikke mange måneder, før adoptivforældrene oplevede en voldsom vrede fra deres ældste datter. Amy kunne være voldelig, stak af hjemmefra og truede med at begå selvmord.
-Vi skulle næsten slås med hende. Hun skulle fysisk mærke sig selv, fortæller forældrene.
De beskriver et familieliv, der langsomt gik i opløsning. I hverdagen var de presset af Amy, som ifølge forældrene lider af "tilknytningsforstyrrelser". Hun er blevet afvist af sin biologiske mor og for ikke også at blive skubbet væk af sin ny familie i Danmark, reagerer hun negativt på forældrenes kærlighed. Kenneth Steen fortolker "tilknytningsforstyrrelser" med et eksempel: Når man er teenager og har en kæreste, gælder det om at være den første, der slår op. Ellers står man tilbage som den, der taber ansigt.
- Vi er selv overraskende over, hvor pressede vi blev. Hun fyldte meget og ville hele tiden være i centrum. Det var uudtømmeligt så meget opmærksomhed hun forlangte. Vi har jo også vores yngste datter at tænke på, siger 37-årige Oxana Steen.
Læs hele interviewet i Sjællandske torsdag.
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Google translation to English
Zealand has spoken with Oxana and Kenneth Steen, who in 2009 adopted two girls in Ethiopia. The oldest girl, Amy, is now located in a residence. Parents working to rebuild Amy's confidence in them. They promise never to betray Amy again.
It writes Zealand.
- There is nothing we want more fervently than getting Amy back to our family.
Oxana and Kenneth Steen stands for the first time in public and tell their version of what led to the forced removal of their daughter Amy. The couple works closely with Næstved Municipality and residence Ark., where 12-year-old Amy is positioned in the long determination to rebuild trust relationship, so the girl even can get back to his parents and little sister Isabella.
-We love Amy and we are fighting for her, says Kenneth Steen to Sealand.
The couple has for months felt vilified as miserable parents who brought a child in Ethiopia and subsequently got the girl placed with a foster family. The case of Amy has aroused huge anger across the country. It was especially a videotape of a violent movement from the girl's foster family to a secret holiday that has created outrage and debate on children's rights.
Threatened suicide
Amy came to Denmark from Ethiopia with his sister in 2009. It was not many months before the adoptive parents experienced a violent anger from their eldest daughter. Amy could be violent, ran away from home and threatened to commit suicide.
-We were almost fighting with her. She had physical brand itself, tells parents.
They describe a family that slowly disintegrated. In everyday life, they were pressured by Amy, according to her parents suffer from "attachment disorder". She has been rejected by his biological mother and not also being pushed away from his new family in Denmark, she responds negatively to parental love. Kenneth Steen interprets "attachment disorders" with an example: When you're a teenager and have a girlfriend, it is important to be the first to turn up. Otherwise, all that is left as that losing face.
- We are even surprising at how pressed we were. She filled a lot and would always be in the center. It was inexhaustible so much attention she demanded. We also have our youngest daughter to think about, says 37-year-old Oxana Steen.
Read the full interview in Sjællandske Thursday.