Field of Dreams: A Word From the Director

A Word From the Director:

Welcome to your journey into the adoption process!

Hi! My name is Jennifer Holdren. I am the Executive Director of "A Field of Dreams". I am an adoptive mom of two little ones from Guatemala. They are the loves of my life and the apples of my eye. Every time I look into their faces, I thank God for them.

I opened this agency for two main reasons:

1. Education: Giving everyone who calls and comes in for a meeting with me all of their options for adoption.

2. Support: There is always someone here to answer any questions and just listen to you when you need it. (It’s similar to a hug across the phone, so to speak.)

I was blessed with two biological sons. My second son passed away at the age of 13 months, and I was unable to have any more children after that. When I heard the news of not ever being able to have any more kids, I just about lost it. Ever since I was a little girl, the only thing I ever wanted to do was grow up, get married, and have lots of kids. I always had this bad feeling that I would not be able to have kids, but I was blessed with two sons. Everyone kept telling me: "Just be glad that you were able to have children.". Well, I got tired of hearing this, because I was NOT done being a mommy. My second son, Doug, who passed away was a special-needs baby. We never expected him to die from his condition. He died of a disease--Ryes Syndrome--that only a small number of children die from each year. He was still a baby, and you just can’t stop being a mommy to a child that you loved, cared for, and cherished with all of your heart. Parents are always the ones who die before there children, or so I thought. I was lost, totally lost, without him. I still remember 7:00am and 3:00pm. Those were the times that I would have to give him his medications. Those times of day will never go away in my mind, even after 18 years.

I went through IVF several different times (which didn’t work) and spent a lot of money on the procedures. I was going to do it one more time and said to myself, “Do I want to get something out of the money that we are spending for something that may never happen?” So, we looked into adoption. That was our only option. We both loved kids. We, also, both knew that we could love any child and that it didn’t have to look like us.

Then, I started to talk with different adoption agencies to get some information. This was not an easy task, and I’m sure you all know that. The information that I got from some of these agencies was very scant on what there programs were like. If I got to talk with anyone, I got only the amount of what it would cost, a ridiculous time frame, and that I would not get a healthy child. The child would be a special-needs baby. I had just gone through enough with my baby and didn’t want to hear “special needs” again.

It took us about three years to actually start the adoption process because of all the bad experiences we had. Don’t get me wrong: there are a lot of good agencies out there. You just have to find one that you bond with. The first phone contact is the most important. Of course, we did decide to go international for one main reason: we would not be able to handle a birth mom coming back for her child. I could not go through another loss in our lives.

Guatemala was the country for us, and it has been a great experience (both times). We brought Makayla home at five months. Then, when Makayla was 21-months old, the agency we went through called us. They told us that her birth mom gave birth to a baby boy three days earlier and asked if we were interested in him. There was no question in my mind about that! Financially, we didn’t know how we were going to afford it, but “where there is a will, there is a way” and “everything happens for a reason”. It came together bit-by-bit, and we brought Zachary home when he was seven-months old.

So, it comes right down to this agency. We have been here a little over 9 years. We are growing by leaps and bounds, but we are still a small enough agency to be able to work with each family the way they deserve.

My heart and soul is in this agency. Adoption is not just something for me to do; it is my life. My two little ones remind me everyday just by looking into there faces how wonderful adoption is and can be.

I laid a lot out here on the table about me. Yes, I am human just like everyone else, and I can identify with anything that my couples have gone through. So, you know that my place in this agency is not just a seat behind a desk. It’s pouring everything I have into each family that comes to "A Field of Dreams" to help them through their adoption journey. I hope that you will be our next family.

Respectfully,

Jen Holdren