Trish Maskew & Linh Song

Von: nchild@yahoogroups.com [mailto:nchild@yahoogroups.com] Im Auftrag von Jeffrey Klinke
Gesendet: Samstag, 31. Januar 2009 21:01
An: Nchild
Betreff: [nchild] Ethica -- Trish Maskew & Linh Song

--- In nchild@yahoogroups.com, renata grieco <r.kington@...> wrote:
>
> I know Genitori si diventa, their website and magazine are well done and
> informative. Can I ask what Ethica is?
> Renata
>

Ethica: An Independent Voice for Ethical Adoption:

http://www.ethicanet.org

Ethica was founded by Nchild member Trish Maskew.

Back in 1999, Trish wrote a book on adopting the older
child:

http://www.amazon.com/Our-Own-Adopting-Parenting-Older/dp/0966970128/ref=ed_oe_h

Trish also used to handle Vietnam and Cambodia for one of the bigger U.S. adoption agencies. And she chaired the JCICS Cambodian Committee at the time of the Cambodian crisis and shutdown.

The JCICS (Joint Council on International Children’s Services) is the main lobbying arm for U.S. adoption industry:

http://www.jcics.org/

In any case, Trish left the adoption industry and founded Ethica (which
is staffed entirely by volunteers -- adoptive families).

She then spent a year at the Permanent Bureau of the Hague Conference (writing an implementation manual for the Adoption Convention).

In 2008, Trish Maskew received her law degree and joined the U.S. Department of Justice, Office of Immigration Litigation.

Linh Song is now the Executive Director of Ethica:

"Song joins Ethica with a background in social work and nonprofit administration within the Vietnamese-American and adoption communities. Most recently, she founded and served as executive director of the Mam Non Organization ( www.mamnon.org), a group providing post-adoption support for families that have adopted Vietnamese children. She holds a B.A. and M.S.W. from the University of Michigan, and is a Rockefeller Fellow at the Joiner Center for War and Social Consequences. Her career has been dedicated to social justice issues such as equal access to health care for underprivileged Asian-Americans, humanitarian work, research on the experiences of Vietnamese birthmothers, and the fostering of positive racial identities and cultural awareness within the transracial adoption community."

http://fleasbiting.blogspot.com/2007/03/ethica-appoints-new-executive-director.html

See also Mam Non:

History

Mam Non is a 5 year old organization, founded by Linh Song after her parents adopted her brother from Vietnam. The first Vietnamese-American family to adopt an older child, they became close to the Michigan adoption community and worked to answer cultural questions. Linh has since expanded efforts to addressing racial awareness, reception to the greater Vietnamese community, and ways to incorporate their children’s Vietnamese legacy into an American identity. There are some overlapping issues faced by adoptees and Vietnamese-Americans in negotiating cultures and identities, so this is one common ground that both communities have met upon. Mam Non has also developed partnerships with humanitarian groups within Vietnam and assisted adult adoptees in their birthparent searches. The organization is based in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

Meaning

Mam Non comes from the Vietnamese maxim, “Tre gia, mang moc.” or “While the bamboo grows older, the young shoot sprouts.” The saying symbolizes the relationship between the older and younger generations. Mam Non literally translates to “sprout,” and is pronounced “Mum Non."

http://www.mamnon.org/?page_id=2

Trish's post below (from CAL -- the main Cambodian forum) will give you a feel for Ethica. It is the best post that I've ever read on adoption.

Since March of 2005, I've monitored Nepali adoptions for Ethica.

Jeffrey

P.S. -- Not all corruption stems from the sending countries.

Reprinted with Trish's permission:

Date: Thu, 2 Dec 2004 16:05:30 -0500
From: <trish_maskew@
Subject: Time to get real

Dear All,

First, let me say that I started this post yesterday
and it is not a response to Jeannene's email of
earlier although I was very interested to hear her
take on things. This post has been brewing in my head
for days!

I have watched the discussion on this list for days
now, with all the he said, she said and blame being
pointed. The sad fact is that everyone bears some
responsibility--not only for the problems in Cambodia,
but those around the world.

For those of you who don't know my background, here
are the bare facts. I was working for an agency in
Vietnam when I was asked to begin working in Cambodia
after the agency's previous coordinator left. I agreed
and was told I would receive contracts, files, etc. in
a few days. Those never came. All I knew about the
program at the time was that it was with someone named
Serey, that the country had just reopened with revised
and upgraded laws and that it was moving well. I made
some calls to other agencies who were working with him
and asked a bunch of questions, and received answers
that seemed logical. My requests to travel to Cambodia
were denied by my director for financial reasons.

A few things that I can say, with regard to Jeannene's
post fit here. I questioned why all the kids were
"abandoned" and was told that it was culturally
unacceptable to relinquish, as it is in China. That
seemed logical. I was told that they had checked, and
yes, he really did receive children from police,
hospitals, etc., which was the norm in Vietnam. None
of this seemed outside the ordinary to me, so in this
way I agree with Jeannene. Once I saw the first set of
papers from Cambodia--which we only got after the
first family traveled, I was seriously concerned.

There was little documentation; one signature on the
abandonment, etc. By this time, I had talked to
others, with other facilitators, and knew that all the
documentation looked the same--that is all the
facilitators were pretty much issuing identical
paperwork, so it wasn't unordinary in that way--but
compared to what I had seen in other countries it was
really, really sparse.

My demands to travel to Cambodia increased and I was
finally granted permission to go--to ask questions,
get contracts, find out where the kids were coming
from etc. By this time we had 20 families in the
program, and I was growing increasingly uncomfortable.
My trip was planned for a couple days after Sept. 11th
and was cancelled--and I told my agency that I was
growing uncomfortable giving any more referrals until
we had answers.

And then all hell broke loose.

In the years since, I have been burdened by the
responsibility I feel for "my families," and the fact
that I had not simply refused to proceed in Cambodia
until I had sufficient answers. In some ways, I agree
with Jeannene in that this was considered "normal" in
many places--information was hard to come by, and we
were all feeling our way. But on the other hand, I
also know that it should not be this way at all. And
this is where my view starts to diverge from others.

Even in the beginning, I knew other agencies were
playing fast and loose with the rules. How? Because I
was getting phone calls from prospective parents with
4 or 5 kids asking if we could place kids with them.
When I would reply that Cambodia had a law saying you
could have only two kids in the home, I was told,
"well agency x says they can do it".

And that wasn't the only thing happening. Working as
the chair of the JCICS Cambodia Caucus during the
crisis gave me a close up view. I will never forget
the day that an agency director called to tell me they
had been falsifying homestudies because "someone told
me to". I don't accept that argument from my children!
And we are supposed to excuse agency behavior because
of it?

I have watched over the last couple of years as
agencies have proclaimed on this list that they only
did x, y or z because the facilitator said that was
how it should be done. Interestingly, some agencies
working with the same facilitator I was have
proclaimed their innocence by saying that he told them
to change a homestudy or that Cambodia really didn't
mind this rule or that. And I would sit here and stare
at the screen and think, "Hmmm...he never once told ME
to do that!"

Which makes me ask questions like: Are agencies asking
facilitators how to get around the rules? And I think
the short answer is yes. It happens all the time.

It is easy to sit here on this side of the ocean and
blame things on those on the other side. This is the
number one thing that agencies use to disavow
themselves of any responsibility.

Take a good look at agency contracts. Families are
asked to sign away any responsibility that the agency
may have to get accurate info, to ascertain a child's
true medical status, to be responsible for money wired
abroad, etc. The bottom line is that many, many
agencies rely on "not our problem" as their answer.
Not all agencies, but many.

When I speak, I tell people that when I entered this
business, I believed what I was always hearing--that
the majority of agencies did things well, and a small
minority were the bad apples. And I also tell them how
my view has changed--particularly since Cambodia. I no
longer believe that.

I *DO* believe that most agencies do this work with
the best of intentions. But many have lost their way
because of situational ethics--because they make
decisions based on the case of the moment vs. the big
picture and because they have become much more
concerned about their paying clients and keeping
agencies afloat than about children.

Some find that view harsh, but experience bears it
out. Even in the midst of the moratorium, agencies
were giving referrals. When they couldn't do so here
anymore, some began giving referrals to families in
other countries--even though they knew everything I
had learned during the Cambodia mess. Did these
agencies wonder where the kids were coming from? Why
would an agency do that when there were such huge
unanswered questions? These weren't clients that the
agencies had already signed contracts with--they were
new clients.

Real world experience tells us that rather than it
always being the facilitators who encourage agencies
to stretch the rules, it is often the agencies who
look for loopholes. I've seen it happen over and over
again in country after country.

Cambodia: "The law says the family may have two
children in the home. They do have two. They have four
more, but they have two."

Romania (and now Vietnam): "Special needs cases only.
Well, this law says, "for children in whom it is in
their best interests", and it is in every child's best
interest to get out. So even though they are saying
*special needs* that isn't exactly what the law says
so let's try a few cases for healthy kids and see what
happens."

And one of my favorites, "Well, the attorney may be
paying birth families. I mean let's get real, we all
know they are. But I don't have any control over
that".

The end of my agency career came when a family
informed me that when they arrived in the Eastern
European country they had traveled to, the coordinator
told them to lie to the judge about how long they'd
been there. Upon inquiry, I found out that agencies
KNEW this was happening and did nothing to stop it. It
seems the country required families to be there for 14
days prior to court. The agencies were giving people
the choice to go for 14 days or go for 7 days and lie.
And I was thinking, "WE're giving people the choice to
perjure themselves???"

I was done, and embarked on a new path.

I fully support adoption. There ARE children who need
to be adopted and families who wish to provide homes.
But families deserve better than what they get from
many professionals.

They deserve an adoption system that has all the
protections that most consumers expect are there--but
are not.

They deserve to know that agencies are following the
rules, and watching their backs. They deserve more.
More honesty. More ethics. More responsibility.

Families have responsibilities too. Not to turn a
blind eye to red flags; not to excuse bad behavior on
the part of agencies and facilitators, and not to be
willing to look the other way to get what they want.

Everyone has a role, and it is up to all of us to play
it, or Cambodia will be for naught. We can't let that
happen.

As we speak, adoptive families are experiencing
problems around the world--many of the same ones that
you experienced in Cambodia. Have we learned? A
little, but not near enough. When all of us refuse to
see the real problems, the children lose.

Moratoriums do not help children. And moratoriums are
caused by unethical and illegal behavior. The
statistics are shocking. 43% of the "top 20" countries
over the last 15 years are now closed. 43%!!! How long
do we let this go without demanding more?

It's time. Time to learn. Time to stop accepting
excuses. Time to demand accountability. Time to act.
Time to stop blaming each other and look only at
ourselves and what WE did, know, do. That is where
real change will start. We are the voices of
experience. And until we tell the world what things
are REALLY like out there, it will not change.

We're trying to do that at Ethica. Ethica was born of
the hell that was Cambodia. And it exists to try and
prevent the crisis that happened there from happening
again. We would love to have your help. It is time to
take back the power!

Trish Maskew, President and CEO
Ethica: A Voice for Ethical Adoption
www.ethicanet.org

__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________

Message: 2
Date: Thu, 2 Dec 2004 16:21:26 -0500
From: <trish_maskew@
Subject: One small addition

Sorry, one more point. For the record. I believe that
all the facilitators were doing things wrong in
Cambodia. It may haven varied by degree. It may have
varied by intention. But I have been told by
officials, and believe, that everyone was playing
loose and fast with the rules.

I have encouraged officials, repeatedly, to
investigate anyone they felt was involved in
wrongdoing--on both sides of the ocean, regardless of
nationality. And we will continue to encourage that.

Every family deserves to know the truth. There may be
limitations on what they can find, and on what they
can do with what they find, but there are no
limitations on the need for truthfulness and honesty.

Nothing is fixed, or gained, by continued
protestations of innocence or comparison of who is
more guilty. The problems were pervasive--and they
still are.

It is the burden we will all live with for years to
come. Or at least we should. That burden will only be
lifted when we can all sit around and discuss how much
things have changed--and how those changes have kept a
new tragedy from occurring.

Trish

Trish Maskew, President and CEO
Ethica: A Voice for Ethical Adoption
www.ethicanet.org

For more information, see Ethica's website:

http://www.ethicanet.org

Also Ethica's blog:

http://ethica.ning.com

If you find yourself entangled with an unethical agency, ring or email Ethica:

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Publication date: 2009 Jan 31

Countries: Cambodia, Romania

Organizations: Genitori si diventa - onlus

Persons: Trish Maskew, Serey Puth