exposing the dark side of adoption
Register Log in

Italians make best parents for adopted Indian children

public

By Kavita Bajeli-Datt

October 18, 2009 /  Sulekha.com

NEW DELHI - Italians and Spaniards make the best parents for adoptive Indian children among foreigners and they don’t mind taking in children who are older, have faced trauma or suffer some handicap, says an adoption agency official.

“Many foreigners come to India to adopt children, but we have found that Italian and Spanish couples make wonderful parents,” said Leila Baig, honorary secretary of the Coordinating Voluntary Adoption Resource Agency (CVARA), a voluntary association of 10 adoption agencies in Delhi.

“The updates we have got later indicate that they make good parents,” Baig told IANS.

However, she said it would be wrong to say that other foreigners do not make good parents. “Most of the children that foreigners adopt are older, with a psychological or some other treatable problem. But they don’t mind it,” she added.

“In fact, some of them even ask us especially for those children who have not been adopted by others or have been rejected because of behavioural problems. When we see the same children later, we find they are changed drastically. Maybe, they are given personalised attention or a very good home atmosphere,” Baig said.

“We have also found that they give wholehearted love to the child and tackle the child in such a manner that even a difficult one or a child facing psychological difficulties is able to adjust with them well,” she added.

Baig said Indians mostly adopt children of below one year, healthy and fair. “Indian couples have high expectations from the child they adopt. They want a healthy child who is not dark. But foreigners have no such problems.”

Sister Lucy Joseph, sister-in-charge at the Holy Cross Social Service Center, one of the adoption centres, in north Delhi, agreed with Baig.

“It is true that both Italians and Spaniards make good parents. It could be that they are emotional, just like Indians. And like Indians, give importance to family. They are close to each other and share great bonding,” Joseph told IANS.

Americans, Australians and Germans are the other foreigners who come to the centre for adoption.

“They don’t mind adopting siblings or even triplets and are open to taking children who are above five years, or even children who are not so intelligent, need some treatable medical help or have some handicap,” she added.

“We give preference to Indians first. Indians usually select young and healthy children. They don’t accept children who have even a bit of health problem, or are dark. So, those who are left behind, we try to settle them. And we select foreign couples with whom these children will do well,” Joseph added.

She said the organisation seeks quarterly reports and photographs from the parents. “This shows us that the children have settled well,” she added.

“We also meet the children when sometimes these Italian or Spanish families come to India to adopt another child. The child looks happy, healthy and comfortable. We only want that our children should integrate well with their adopted families,” she added.

She also had a word of praise for Americans.

“Some American couples have even adopted children who were blind and had cerebral palsy. Maybe they adopted them because they have access to good infrastructure and medical facilities. The adoption brings joy to both parents and child,” she added.

Till June this year, the agency has been able to provide 73 children to Indian parents, 21 to non-resident Indians and 81 to foreigners.

2009 Oct 18