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Afather sent this email to a friend of mine today.

I haven't posted here in a long time.

When I posted before I mentioned that my foster/adoptive parents are Independent Fundamentalist Baptist's. My adad is a IFB pastor. I was adopted right before I turned 18 once they had milked every dime they could out of the system. You see, he had to have his pastor buddies pat him on the back at those conferences for what a good boy he was for becoming "a father to the fatherless." (Psalm 68:5). My amom made it very clear from the beginning that she didn't want me, it was all his idea. She had 6 children of her own and didn't want another.

Adopters who back out of adoption; selfish or justified?

This question was asked on Y!A:  How can we back out of this adoption? I feel kind of guilty...? 

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AkLFjXvugZrRm6vqbWFNfxUh...

Unfortunately I was surprised by the additional information and will quote the parts that got my hackles up.

"We met the BM (Paige) though our minister, she's only 17 and seemed excited about us adopting the baby."

Just another throwaway mother .....

I was 19 and working for the civil service when I had my son.  Abortion wasn't an option as I knew i wanted to raise my son and adoption never crossed my mind.  My parents were furious so they arranged everything.  I believed all the lies they told and the lies that the case worker from the adoption agency told me.  It never occurred to me that my parents would lie to me or that the case worker would with hold information as well as lie.   I didn't even know I couldn't consent to surrender my son until he was at least 6 weeks old.  When I was told it was too

Sixth Annual Demons of Adoption Award Nominations

Every year the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute(CCAI) organizes a gala where Members of Congress can give an Angel in Adoption Award TM to constituents of their state or district who have been advocates for adoption.

Originally intended to champion the adoption of children from foster care, the Angels in Adoption Awards have grown into an adoption industry love-fest, awarding adoption attorney's, directors of adoption agencies and other representatives of the adoption industry.

Many of the recipients of the Angels in Adoption Awards have nothing to do with adoption from foster care, and their main achievement is making a sound business out of the commerce in children.

In 2007 Pound Pup Legacy instituted the annual Demons of Adoption Awards to raise a voice against adoption propaganda and the self congratulatory practices of the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute's annual Angels in Adoption Awards.

Until September 30 you, the reader, can nominate candidates for the sixth annual Demons of Adoption Award. After that date, PPL will post a poll where readers may vote for the nominees.

The link for nominations may be found at: http://poundpuplegacy.org/sixth_demons_of_adoption_nominations

When posting, please state your nominee and a short explanation as to why this candidate has the dubious honor of winning the award.

Previous editions:

First Annual Demons of Adoption Awards (award went to the National Council for Adoption)
Second Annual Demons of Adoption Awards (award went to the makers of Juno)
Third Annual Demons of Adoption Awards (award went to Bethany Christian Services)
Fourth Annual Demons of Adoption Awards (award went to Joint Council on International Children's Services)
Fifth Annual Demons of Adoption Awards (award went to Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints)

Adoption Search Discoveries

Adoptee Matthew Salesses wrote a wonderful response to adoptive parent Ann Brenoff's article, My Daughter's Baby Picture, featured in the August 8, 2012 edition of Huffington Post.

Pursuing what you want to pursue in the world of inter-country adoption

The Christian Post is at it again. After having posted three extremely biased articles about inter-country adoption earlier this year, they now continue their barrage of misinformation, linking it to the presentation of the documentary "Stuck".

Stuck is produced by Both Ends Burning, an organization whose goal is to expand inter-county adoption by a factor of five. Both Ends Burning is the brain child of former football player Craig Juntunen, after being ticked off by the level of red tape he met when trying to adopt himself.

The mentality behind Both Ends Burning is made very clear in an interview, Kathryn Joyce held with Juntunen, for the article The Evangelical Adoption Crusade

Orphanology, the mind-bending rationalization of evangelical adoption

Yesterday, the Baptist Press published an interview with Tony Merida, the author of the book Orphanology, a book promoting adoption and orphan care on an evangelical basis.

Let's dissect the article in order to get a better understanding of the movement that has been taking over the adoption system over the last 10 years. The article starts introducing the author of the book:

Every adoption story is unique, but the tale of how pastor and author Tony Merida came to see he should adopt -- essentially, through his own sermon -- likely is quite rare.

The uniqueness of things is of course debatable. In The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, Blondie says: Every gun makes its own tune, while Family Guy's Stewie claims: A bullet sounds the same in every language.

When an adoptee resists touch and comfort (and develops a new dysfunction)

In my never-ending quest for self-improvement and enlightenment, I found a report titled "Somatic-Experiential Sex Therapy:  A Body-Centered Gestalt Approach to Sexual Concerns", and as I was reading the pages, I found myself -- parts of my own story  -- being explained to readers.

Not literally, of course.

Instead, the clinician's focus and example was based on the sexual dynamics and dysfunctions that develop when the child of a biologically intact family is raised and nurtured (?) by a depressed or sexually inappropriate care-taker.  But I believe many of the same sexual-related fears and anxieties can be repeated in thematic style for the adoptee put in similar dysfunctional (unhealthy) hands.  Stella Resnick, PhD from Los Angeles wrote:

Lets see how long

Well I'm back. Lost the plot completely. Time to face my adoption demons again. :{

An American Adoption Plan: Made in China

The other day I was reviewing some articles about gendercide in China, the practice of forced abortion, and child trafficking, and I was thinking how these types of events help create complex adoption issues many foreign born adoptees have to face, especially if one was adopted from a chauvinistic society like India or China. It seems there is a sad irony that exists when foreign social activists fighting for human rights come to America seeking support and assistance from American politicians.

Animal instincts, attachment, bonding, and feeling scared

Lately, I have been exchanging emails with an Amother and an adult adoptee, and as strange as it may sound, while each has very different stories related to very different phases in life, both seem to be sharing the same problem: they don't know what to do when the walls go up, and the barriers surround.

I find myself in the precarious position of knowing some of the whys, the hows and the what-not-to-do's when it comes to learning how to bridge the gap from scared little bear, to caring and capable warm human being.

Mother's Day: What are we celebating?

Last year, I wrote Adapting to Mother's Day, After Adoption,  a piece that introduces readers to the heartbreak some must endure when one person's loss becomes some other person's gain, thanks to illegal unethical adoption practices - found throughout Adoptionland.  I reached the conclusion that children kidnapped and forced into an adoption plan should not be expected to celebrate Mother's Day.  Given all that can transpire between and through the hands of corrupt doctors, lawyers, judges, and a

Is the US State Dept. Opposed to Inter-Country Adoption? - A rebuttal

This weekend, the Christian Post published its third installment of their saga about inter-country adoption, under the title: Is the US State Dept. Opposed to Inter-Country Adoption?

It is a curious little piece, claiming to give an answer to the question why the number of inter-country adoptions over the last 8 years have dropped significantly. Unfortunately the article doesn't investigate the matter, but tries to prove a preconceived idea, that the Hague Convention, UNICEF and the policies of the Department of State are to be blamed for this decline.

The bias of the article is overwhelming, so we'd like to dissect it for our readers and put this piece into perspective. The author starts with the following:

Do you like me for ME, or what!

** This is a continuation of a response to Kerry's "Narcissistic behavior in the adoptee's relationships" post. **

She said:

I think the pattern to keeping and maintaining an unsatisfying relationship has more to do with guilt and the common pattern that exists in adoption itself, but I'd like feedback from others outside my immediate circle, as I know when it comes to myself, I can turn every bump in life into an adoption issue.

Narcissistic behavior in the adoptee's relationships

I've decided to go public with some personal information about myself because the topic I've been discussing in private has touched many aspects of my life, including PPL.

I'm going through some difficult times in a few personal relationships.  This is not new for me; maintaining a close (loving?) relationship has always been difficult for me.  But long breaks, caused by normal every day events, like work or school, have made me keenly awareness of an odd inability in me, a characteristic I'd like to change.

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