Happy ending for Baby Sam? Adolescence may tell

By JOUNICE L. NEALY

As both sets of Sam Johnson's parents struggle with how to best take him through the big changes ahead, experts will offer ideas to smooth the transition.

But they say there's no way to guarantee a happy ending.

"You don't know until first the child traverses puberty and adolescence," said David Kirschner, a North Merrick, N.Y., psychologist with a specialty in adoption. He isn't familiar with all the details of the Johnson-Vietri custody battle, but has counseled hundreds of adoptees.

"Most of the adoption issues hit the fan in adolescence. That's the identity-seeking stage. You really can't tell yet whether there's going to be no problems. (But) there will definitely be issues."

Most child psychology experts the Times spoke with agree on the need for long-term therapy.

Some also said that even though Sam has not yet been told of the potential transfer from his adoptive parents Mark and Tracy Johnson, to his birth father, Christopher Vietri, he probably has felt the tension building.

"Kids are not dopes, you know. He's still (4 years old), but he's able to tell sadness and happiness and chaos. The only way that child can win is if (the parents) act like friends," said Betty Jean Lifton, who specializes in adoption psychology in New York.

If Sam makes it to his birth father "it's like another adoption.

The father is going to be attentive to the best of his ability and extremely dedicated to being a parent," said David Berndt, a Maryland childhood psychologist. "One thing where he needs to be careful about is the tendency to overdo it. The natural tendency is to try to be the perfect dad, and that could be devastating to any child."

Experts say that plenty of adoptees cope with their past and have successful lives. But Kirschner guards against generalizing that adoptees returning to a birth parent will adjust well automatically.

Some recently published updates on highly publicized adoptions indicate the children are now doing well.

In an Illinois case similar to Baby Sam's, Danny "Baby Richard" Kirchner, now 9, was returned to his biological father in 1995. He was placed for adoption shortly after birth by his mother, who was angry with Danny's father. She told the father the baby had died.

After Danny's father learned the truth, he fought successfully for custody. The televised transfer showed the boy's tears and frightened expressions. Earlier this year, it was reported in the Chicago Tribune that Danny has recovered well. He's no longer in therapy and is enrolled in public school and adores his two little sisters, said the birth father's attorney, Michael Foley.

Baby Jessica, now Anna Jacqueline Schmidt, 9, also is said to be thriving, according to her father, Dan Schmidt.

She was taken from her adoptive parents' Michigan home and returned to her Iowa birth parents in 1993 as TV cameras rolled.

For Sam's adoptive mother, the images of those child transfers are haunting.

"I thought after Baby Richard or Baby Jessica, a child's life would matter," said Tracy Johnson.

Lifton counts several helpful factors in Sam's situation. Vietri's claim of Sam is positive because adopted people sometimes feel abandoned.

"Adults (who were adopted as kids) will talk about wanting to be claimed," Lifton said. "The positive part is he'll grow up with his birth family, and he'll know his story," Lifton said.

But she sees a problem with statements Vietri made about not wanting Sam to have any contact with the Johnsons. Vietri later said he would consider contact after Sam adjusts to his new home.

"If he really cares about his son, he should agree that this family should be a part of transition. You can't suddenly take a child from the people he's known," Lifton said.

Yet it's possible that Sam will blame himself for losing his adoptive parents.

Around that age, some kids are enamored with heroes and inclined to superhero fantasy play. They then become a little egocentric, according to Berndt.

"He will think that everything that happens to him is due to him. It's good and bad," Berndt said. "It's good that he's filled with self-confidence, and that should buffer some of the initial pain. But it's bad because he's going to blame himself for having lost them. That will predispose him to depression."

- Times researcher Kitty Bennett assisted and information from the Chicago Tribune and Ladies Home Journal were used in this report.