exposing the dark side of adoption
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Saints or Sinners?

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By Diane Norman

Middle Tyger Bureau; Editor

GREER -- Yellow ribbons circle barren trees in Bill and Debbie Rettew's yard, symbols oi‘ their desire to regain custody of 15 children removed by court order on Nov. 8.

But members of the Rettew family and the children's court-appointed representatives conflict on whether those children want to or should go back.

State Department of Social Services workers took the children from the home after they received reports of beatings and educational neglect.

Since then, two children have said they want no further contact with the Renews, and others had mixed reactions to a supervised visit with the couple on Nov. 20, according to a Nov. 30 report the children's guardian ad iitem filed with Family Court.

That is unbelievable to supporters of the Rettews, who have made a Christian mission of caring for troubled, handicapped and unwanted children for more than 20 years.

The Rettews' adult son,Will Beddingfield of Clemmons, N.C., said he attended a visit the children had with his parents Friday, and all 15 were united in their desire to return home. “They verbalized then, in no uncertain terms, that they want to come back to my parents‘ house,"  Beddingfield said.

If accusations of neglect and abuse were true, Beddingfield said, the children wouldn't want a reunion.

Whether the children return is to be decided in a Family Court hearing scheduled Feb. 11-15 in Greenville.

Mounting evidence

Additional information that has come to light since the children's removal — including evidence of physical deprivation and emotional trauma — reinforces DSS recommendations that the couple be declared guilty of mental abuse and oi’ neglect, guardian Eric Graben wrote in the Nov. 30 report.

Caregivers reported the children had voracious appetites and commented on the availability of food in the new home. Graben wrote. and some

children made dramatic weight gains.

The body of evidence supporting the children's emergency removal -- and casting a shadow over their return - has mounted to more than 800

pages, a stack at least 4 inches thick.

Family Court Judge Amy Sutherland released documents in thet Rettew's case int he Herald-Journal Friday. after a newspaper lawyer filed a consent order assuring that the children's identifies will not be disclosed.

Though DSS investigations generally are closed to public scrutiny the Rettew case is exceptional because of the family's high public profile.

The family has traveled extensively among churches as a Christian singing group. and Attorney General Charlie Condon named Bill Rettew the

state‘: Father of the Year in 1999.

The couple has eared for as many as 20 childrenat one time, all of them placed with the Rettews through private referrals that were not supervised by the State.

Sutherland has barred all parties in the Rettew case from speaking with the media.

But the documents detail why state workers took the children into emergency protective custody.

Children who formerly lived with the Rettews, some now adults, say Bill Rettew beat them with belts. slammed them into walls and threw children down stairs.

Other evidence suggests children were not being educated and that medical and dental care was inadequate.

The records also allude to the Rettews‘ growing feelings of persecution and unwillingness to cooperate with Investigators.

The family believes state officials are trying to tell them how they should raise their children.Beddlngfield said.

The abuse and neglect allegations are false, he said. and many of the stories of maltreatment are coming from two children who could not adapt to the structured, disciplined environment of the Rettew home.

“I just think that it's important to know that the situation has been ongoing for several years now and that there's been nothing that‘s been substantiated and that it‘s time for the children to come heck to the home where they belong," Beddingfield said.

Questions begin

DSS workers first entered the Renews’ life in November 1993, when en adopted adolescent boy ran away from home.

The child didn‘t want to return to the Rertew home. arid Bill Rettew told authorities he didn't want the boy back.

DSS took the buy Into emergency protective custody and eventually placed him in foster care.

After he left the Rettews. the boy told investigators Bill Rettew had beaten him with a ruler, slammed his fingers in the pantry door because he stole food and once punched him in the nose.

In a report on the boy's case history. the guardian wrote, "The Reltews are very conservative and probably use corporal punishment: however, I am unable to determine at this time whether their use of corporal punishment is appropriate or excessive. A new DSS investigation is under way."

He adds that the Rettews' home is pleasant and well kept. But he finds characteristics that cause concern.

"The kids have little contact with the world outside the home. The kids sing in e family choir that performs at area churches, so the kids do not appear to have a regular church. They appear to be kept in a ‘gilded cage.‘ where they are cared for, but sheltered much more than most children, ”the report says.

"The Rettews impose age-inappropriate rules  probably for purposes of ‘crowd control.‘

For example, when I child) was a teen-ager. he still had a bedtime of 7:30.

"The Rettews appear to be committed Christians who take care of kids out of sincere love for God; however they do not appear to love the kids in and of themselves," the report says.

It adds that the children are interchangeable to the parents, so long as the Rettews are caring for as many children as possible.

“Consequently. (child) has never had parents who really love him," the guardian concludes.

Always enough love

Beddingfield says those assertions are just wrong. "I think people have a hard time understanding how people are able to take care of that

many children," he said.

On the day-to-day level. the older children help the younger ones with chores like tooth-brushing and face washing, Beddingfield said. But care is always supervised by the parents. and each child gets individual attention. he said.

"They have always had the ability; they have always had love to give each and every child,“ Beddingfield said.

Many oi‘ the children have come to the Rettews from an environment where they didn't get enough love. he said. and his parents have tried to make up the deficit.

Beddingfield said the state is trying to tell the Renews how many children they can have.

State evaluation

A Family Court judge ordered on June 2, 2000. that every child in the Renew home be evaluated.

After a series of legal delays, the court ordered on March 20, 2001, that a panel be formed to conduct those evaluations.

The panel was composed of William N. Wheeler of the Center for Biblical Counseling.who was selected by the Rettews, Sonya O‘Neil of Turning Leaves Therapy of Spaflanburg, selected by DSS, and Kimberly Chastoin, a pastoral counselor affiliated with Buncombe Street

United Methodist Church in Greenville, selected by Graben.

Though the Rettews permitted the children to be evaluated, Graben wrote. they withheld medical and educational informatlori that delayed and complicated the process.

The counselors’ report, submitted to the court on Nov. 7, 2001. confirms earlier impressions — that the children live an isolated life and

that the Rettews have a one-size-fits-all" orientation toward parenting.

"It tends to strip away individualization of dreams, self-dignity and personal hope. During the interviews, the children largely lacked the ability to

articulate a Future outside of staying on the Rettew ‘property,‘ “ the report says.

The team also questioned the level of medical and mental health services and basic care provided the children.

Though the kitchen appeared to be well-stocked, often with donated items, the team expressed concern that food was used as a method of discipline and that the food storage area was locked.

“The panel observed that most of the children and teens appear to be on the lower end scale of the weight chart for their age." the report says.

Though the Renews denied using corporal punishment  most of the children told the team that they received spankings.

“Another common component for discipline for adolescent males included calling the police." the report says. “They reported the police coming on the property many times  but no mental health therapy intervention was attempted until court ordered.“

The report states: "The ‘Rettews must make specific changes in their discipline in order to mailttain these children in their home."

The report recommends that the Rettews refrain from corporal punishment and that an in-home therapy team help the parents develop behavior management systems especially for the emotionally disturbed children.

Incredible allegations

Beddingfletd finds the accusations and the panel‘s suggestions incredible. If anyone has experience in child-rearing, he said. it's his parents.

Beddingfield, Debbie Rettew's son from her first marriage. has lived with Bill Renew since he was 6 years old.

Now 33. Beddingfield said his parents began taking in foster children when he was 9.

Though he was spanked a few times when he was a child. Beddingfield said he never saw his father fly into a rage or in any way physically

abuse anyone.

"I have never seen my dad lose control,." Beddingfield said.

"No charges have been brought against my parents in the court system. and that's something that has a lot of merit. There is nothing there,“

he said.

As to the children's medical and nutritional needs. Beddingfield said his parents have followed the advice of their family physician and that the children had plentiful meals.

“There has never been a time when the children have not have enough to eat.“ he said. “The proper nutrition was there."

Clash of church and stale

Beddingfield sees the Family Court case as a clash between his parents’ conservative Christian philosophy and the state's secular values.

"I think we get back to the fact the state is telling my mom and dad, ‘This is how you should raise your children, and this is the environment they should be in,‘ " Beddingfield said.

The best evidence of their care, he said, comes from the children.

One boy, new 19, was not expected to live beyond his first birthday. Beddirlgfield said.

The child's doctor concluded, “It has to be the love and the care that's been given because without that, he would not have survived," Beddingfield said.

2002 Jan 20