History and Heritage
As an International Adoptee, from the Closed Era, how does the Adoption Industry answer for the loss of family history and heritage so many of us do without, because strangers chose one land... one group of people is better than another?
My parents made no effort teaching me about my first family, and my own mother-land. I was adopted by Americans, I was therefore "American". I was made better because of the better American parents. If not for "them" I would be nothing but a moaning, groping, vegetable.
I was born into one family, but sold to another... and I was forced to believe the second-choice... the second-alternative and plan was a better one for me. This second family failed to see a very simple truth about me and my adoption-story: A completely different family history completes me; a different heritage defines me, and all of that (what could have been) has been denied because one group... one land... has decided one side is better than the other. [How dare I not be grateful for all the second-chances given me?]
Had the choice been mine, I would never have been adopted by those who "chose me". If I had the choice, I would have chosen NOT to have been born; I would have chosen for my mother and father to be strong; I would have chosen to stay in an orphanage with other pitiful orphans were... I would have chosen any of those before I would chose to be sold to a home where I would later be used, abused, dismissed, and ignored.
Why? At least I would not have been forced to suffer the pain I felt, all alone... the silent angry adoptee. Had I never been born... had I been kept where I belonged... had I remained a pitiful orphan, I would at least have remained as one-within-the-whole group, and not a lone piece of prey.