Been reading a bit more on your site and I thought I would share some more with you. Although I don't think I was necessarily abused by my Aparents it certainly never stopped me from realizing that the whole chosen/ grew in her heart not in her womb thing was bullshit created by a pro adoption agenda. Kinda like an engagement ring made out of a cubic zerconia. Beautiful and yet still fake. You may want and wish it was real but it's not.Also it is the pain of being separated from our mothers that is our true and ultimate abuse.
Adversely an abused adoptee at least is spared the lies and false hopes that a true family bond has formed when I find that to be a childish and wishful notion altogether. I found myself thinking of apes today and what happens when the babies are removed from their mothers. In watching such footage it nearly brought me to tears in empathy and yet it wasn't till today that I actually realized that we generally treat apes and kittens better than humans because that's just animal abuse to do such things lol.
Secondly I noticed there are some adoptive moms looking for solace that maybe they'll be different because their intentions are different and they have so much to offer. Well as I said I'm not here to stop the process just to try and heal myself into the super human I have the capacity of being if I am able to overcome the hole in my soul and to gain a family out of the brothers and sisters the shitty system keeps pumping out for me.
Here's my story of support for your perusal when I was in the process of finding my birth parents and also finding out that my much older fiance of four years at the time was a high price call girl lol. I went to an adoption support meeting open to all members of the adoption triad, it was all birth moms and an adoption councilor (obviously paid for by an agency). Well low and behold this meeting was all about telling these women they were doing the right, selfless and brave thing for their children. Wow they did not see me coming bahahaha.
I still wonder how many children I saved from my fate that day by telling these women the truth. The only problem is that the adoption agency could see that I was lost revenue waiting to happen so I was sent a letter asking me not to ever return to their meeting lol.
Also I am very amazed and somewhat glad for you that you gave up your search for your AP. I found mine and I will tell you this much for now. One day as an adoptee I realized that I was a branch ripped from one tree and duct taped to another. When I fell away from that tree and found the tree I belonged to I also found the spot where I fit perfectly into place and yet I was still just a branch broken from that tree and there is and was no way for me to re attach myself. At the end of it all I'm just a dead branch ripped from a family tree and unable to be grafted to any other and in that I am not alone.
Your Bastard Brother and Broken Branch,