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- Quita Puchalla (Quita Davis)
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I sometimes visit a site called chask.org.... in a big way I support their mission, which is to find a new home for these kids without putting them through additional trauma of public foster care; but post like the one below and so many of the others that end up there just continue to make me think; just home many of these kids are truly being hurt by the dx of RAD; it is like some quack can say the kid has RAD, and low a behold it is okay to give up on them... that part of the whole mess really makes me sick
5-year-old Frazer needs a very experienced family
Frazer was born November 15, 2004 in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. She was born to a single mother who later died of AIDS when Frazer was 2 1/2. Frazer is HIV positive. Frazer's grandparents were able to raise her for another year before they placed her in an orphanage where they could manage her HIV+ status.
Since Frazer has been in the United States, she has had her tonsils and adenoids removed as well as extensive dental work. She has also had quarterly visits with an infectious disease specialist who monitors her HIV status. So far, she has been really healthy and doesn't require the HIV medicine - yet.
Frazer is very bright and intelligent. She picked up English in 3 months. She has the ability to be very nurturing and intuitive. She loves to dance and sing... and we consider these to be natural talents. She is hyper-vigilant when it comes to her environment. She often "listens" and understands, even when you don't think she is paying attention. Being that most of her positive qualities stem from the RAD diagnosis, we believe with the right treatment, these qualities will turn out to be her "real" personality and greatest strengths.
Our Expectations for Frazer's new family:
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I hope Fraser can find an Ethiopian family
Or at least a Black parent that can at least prepare her for the onslaught of growing up a Black/African woman in a bigot society that privileges whites. Someone who knows something about the basics of her original context I bet can help her.
It would also help if the family, of whatever stripe, knew something about kids with a history in the medical establishment, which can be brutal enough to adults and outright traumatic to children, especially children in a care situation who are being told every assault done to them is for their own good.
What's likely to happen, though, is some do gooder bunch of Christian bigots, probably white, to prove something to themselves will acquire Fraser. There are rare moments where I feel like I wish I could adopt a little one who is so vulnerable and has so many strikes against her, ones that I share myself. I felt that reading about Fraser.
Alas, the queers adopting is bad for the children. So that's no solution.
Desperate AP's Determined to Dump and Run
Disturbingly, I found from the same source, an ad for a child who was adopted at 6 months, but at the age of six, it would seem she has somehow developed into a child her forever APs no longer want. [All quoted text comes from: http://www.chask.org/waitingchildren.htm ]
According to the write-up:
And later it states:
My, how quick they were to label! Her biggest trouble and problem for these advertising Christian parents seems to be associated with a personality trait -- she likes to dominate.
Once again, if the adopted child does not bond with the parent, or behave as the AP wishes, it MUST be RAD or some type of attachment disorder, something that would prove it's the child, not the parent, who is damaged and defective.
When it is the adoptive parent who states something like, "It breaks my heart because I long for the love that she is willing to give to others, but for some reason cannot share with myself and my husband." , it behooves the rest of us to recognize who has the problem. Hint: it is NOT the child, but the jealous AP, determined to call it quits. Nice so-called Christian family values.
Question: If no physical or sexual abuse is taking pace, when is abandoning and uprooting a child - separating her from those she loves - ever in a child's best interest?
<shaking head in pure disgust>
I would love to know how many of these dump and run ads are found on adoption websites, and what the DOS and sending countries are doing about underground "re-homing" groups focused on the once much wanted adoptees that no longer "fit".
Yesterday, I looked into
Yesterday, I looked into this CHASK organization, which appears to be a registered business name of the National Challenged Homeschoolers Associated Network (NATTHAN), a Christian group dedicated to families home schooling special needs children.
NATTHAN/CHASK is a mom and pop shop run by Thomas and Sherry Bushnell from their home in Kootenai National Forrest, just across the border of Montana, in the Idaho panhandle.
I wasn't able to find the credentials of Thomas Bushnell, but apparently Sherry is a mid-wife, running the Lavender and Roses Birth & Mothering Center, in Libby, MT.
As is often the case with Christian-based groups, there is an abundance of zeal, but very little formal training in the field they operate in. Sure a mid-wife knows a lot about pregnancies and deliveries, but that doesn't make her an expert in the placement and re-homing of children.
This shows in their presentation of children on their re-homing page, presenting children as second-hand goods. Among the current batch, there are two that are old enough to find the ad for their re-homing, and so do their peers. Just think about the impact it has on a child to be listed on the internet as damaged goods.
The listing, with photo, description and email address of the adoptive parents, also makes it sometimes possible to locate these children. Of one of the children, I was able to figure out the neighbourhood he lives in with relative ease. Haven't these CHASK people ever heard of predators, or do they not care?
It's already appalling enough that some adopters don't stand by the children they received through thick and thin, but it's even more disturbing when this ridding of the kid takes place in the public sphere.
I bet they do.
No doubt. Aren't they always. /sarcasm