exposing the dark side of adoption
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THE HAMILTON-REINHARDSEN FAMILY

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THE SEATTLE TIMES

Column: FAMILY PORTRAIT

The family: Karen Hamilton, a physical education teacher at Northshore's Cottage Lake Elementary School; her husband, Jeff Reinhardsen, a Heath-Tecna lab technician; and their adopted Korean-born twins, Millie Won Il and Mege Won Yee, 15 months

-- How they became a family: After several miscarriages, Hamilton and Reinhardsen decided two years ago to adopt, only to learn that she, then 41, was considered too old. One agency that did accept their application was

Travelers Aid Adoption Service

, which specializes in placing Korean children. (Because of a shortage of babies, Travelers is not accepting applications at this time.)

-- The hardest part: The wait. After the couple submitted their application in June 1988, asking for twins of either sex, they were told news of their adoption would come in a phone call. ``When you're a childless couple, you wait every day, every hour, and every time the phone rings your heart is in your mouth,'' Karen recalls.

-- A major high point: The phone call, with news of their twins, that finally came 13 months later, in July 1989. ``We are forever grateful and will always love the girls' teen-age mother for this very courageous and loving gift she gave us,'' Karen says.

-- Bringing them home: The couple flew to Korea and returned with two 8-month-olds on Nov. 14. The girls' first adjustment was to sleeping in cribs instead of Korean-style _ on the floor _ as they had with their foster family. So for the first few nights the entire family slept on the living room rug. ``Now they're just very, very happy girls,'' Karen says. ``They play with each other and jabber. We feel real, real lucky.''

-- Reactions from others: Having apparently identical twins, the parents have discovered, means constant attention. While most people comment on Megen and Millie's attractiveness, Karen reports someone occasionally will ask, ``when they're older will you tell them they're adopted?'' Karen says, ``We really want them to be proud of their Korean heritage.''

-- Changing priorities: The couple used to be very sports oriented, playing lots of tennis, and skiing. Now they find they're much more homebound _ but happily so. ``Our priorites have changed drastically,'' Karen says. ``We have found that housework will always wait for us, but the giggly, cuddly precious moments with our children can't be put on hold.'

Caption:

RICHARD S. HEYZA / SEATTLE TIMES: KAREN HAMILTON AND JEFF REINCHARDSEN WITH THEIR 15-MONTH-OLD TWIN DAUGHTERS, MEGEN WON YEE AND MILLIE WON II.

1990 Jul 29