exposing the dark side of adoption
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THE PERSONAL FAMILY STORY OF LORI JONES, DIRECTOR of A New Arrival

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My husband Larry and I met in 1994 in our home state of Oregon. At first, we dated to become more acquainted with one another as friends. Due to our 18 year age difference neither of us figured that we would become anything more. Well, in the midst of getting to know one another we fell in love!

We had to come to terms with one unresolved issue prior to marriage, whether or not to have children. We had many late night discussions over this. Larry had been previously married and had two very beautiful daughters, Christy and Brenda Lee. Now they were grown and Larry was feeling a sense of wanting to do some traveling. The prospect of children with his young bride would certainly put a crimp in those plans. So, after a lot of soul searching, I had decided I would rather have Larry without children then someone else with children. So with the baby issue resolved we wed at the Virginia City courthouse in Montana to live a childless marriage and to own and operate our new cattle ranch in the peace and quiet of SW Montana. Right? Wrong!

The move from Oregon to Montana made us look at things in a new light. We both began to think that rural Montana and ranch life would be a wonderful environment to raise children. Out of the blue one day, Larry entered our home and said he was thinking he might see the doctor to get "hooked back up". Well, I couldn't get to the phone fast enough to set the appointment.

Talk about beginners luck, within 45 days after the surgery I was pregnant with our first born son, Luke Wayne Jones. Now that we had one child we figured we felt that every child should have at least one brother or sister! So we tried to achieve another pregnancy. Luck had run out and it simply didn't happen. Then during this time, Larry's daughter, Brenda Lee, age 26, was killed in a tragic auto accident involving the vehicle hitting a deer. Her death devastated us

As my secondary infertility continued, we consulted my OB Gyn doctor and began the emotional roller coaster of IVF. In rural Montana IVF meant many weeks of shots in preparation and an eventual trip to Seattle to have the procedure done. So we came home from our very first IVF cycle and to our surprise we were pregnant! Everything seemed to be progressing normally but an ultra sound had revealed that I had lost my daughter at around 13 weeks. I was crushed. After many months of pondering over whether to participate in another cycle my husband and I decided to give it on more try.

On to Seattle again and eventually another positive pregnancy test. When we had a early ultrasound my doctor's face dropped and he said he was sorry but this baby wasn't developing normally and had a very low heartbeat. He had me come back a week later, and this baby was gone too.

The death of Brenda and the loss of my two children seemed overwhelming at times. It was then I remembered saving a article about the Peck family in Montana who had adopted two beautiful children from Cambodia. There were many things I liked about adopting from Cambodia, primarily that the dossier process seemed simple, that we would qualify for a infant and that the process went relatively fast compared to some other international programs.

In September of 1999 working with an agency, Larry brought our Cambodian six month old daughter home. What a miracle God had brought to me. Finally Here was my daughter. I no longer mourned the loss of my miscarriages. The bonding was immediate. Rath Marany now Laryssa Marany Jones had integrated into our family very well.

Now we had baby fever.

One day I called our adoption agency and asked them if there were any babies available for referral since we were INS approved. Two days later we received the call that a three week old girl had been abandoned at the hospital. We felt this would be ideal for our family structure and "white" community in rural SW Montana. Laryssa would have a sister of her ethnicity and she hopefully would not feel so different amongst her peers. Our adoption was at record pace, and four weeks later Larry's bags were packed again. By the way, if my husband could travel to Cambodia, anyone could. He had never been to the East Coast before let alone out of the United States! Our son thinks that when a child is born it is the father who leaves home for a while and returns home on an airplane with the baby in his arms. So, the man that I fell in love with and told me "no" on the children issue is traveling 1/2 way around the world to bring us our babies. Once again it was love at first site with Rath Nearadey AKA Lexus (Lexie) Nearadey Jones now four months old. So, with five of us in a 1200 sq. ft home and three in diapers, Larry and I decided that maybe we should stop here and take a breather. I still wanted to be involved with the adoption process in some form, and I knew I couldn't bring all the orphans home, so here is A New Arrival Adoptions!

One year later, Logan, from Cambodia joined our family and is the brother we always dreamed of for Luke and the girls! And we have purchased a much larger home where our children play freely in the ranchlands of Montana.

Fast forward to seven years after our marriage with four children, a 350 pair cattle ranch, and opening a non-profit adoption agency.... we wouldn't exactly call it peace and quiet but at least there's never a dull moment. My friends are going through the teenage years with their children, Larry's friends are traveling around the world, and they all think we've lost our minds; we wouldn't want it any other way.

2009 May 8