Alloma Gilbert, Christopher Spry and Child A

I am shocked! I recall Eunice Spry and had often referred to my mother as 'a bit of a Eunice' BUT I didn't know the depth of the abuse until I read Victoria Spry's book. Terrible abuse, far far worse than anything I encountered and yet I'm emotionally damaged due to my own upbringing. I recognise so much in Eunice's behaviour although her crimes were far worse. My heart goes out to the three children abused by Spry. I feel abused all over again.
I'm a mum of six beautiful children who are amazing. All I ever wanted to be was a good mum. I believe I am.

I was brought up by an abusive mother who would hit me with the canes from fishing nets and plastic poles from wendy houses which my sister and I had. My younger sister was never beaten... just me and I was very much 'Daddys girl' but he never knew what was going on.
My mother would say I'd asked for it. She would hit me until I was begging her to stop. If I didn't react, she would hit me until I did. I asked her why she used the sticks and her reply was that she wasn't going to hurt her hands because of me! It was awful, I was never able to do anything right. My Dad was my hero and although I never recall my mother being nice to him, he tolerated it until after I left home and then he passed his HGV licence so he was able to stay in his truck all week and at weekends, she went away. I knew if I ever told my dad then he would've gone crazy and I didn't want that, although with hindsight I wish I had told him so as he could've moved on and had some happiness in his life.
I went to hospital numerous times thinking my bones were fractured but they were just badly bruised. It was always my arms or legs... thankfully never my feet like Victoria, Christopher and Alloma.
I recall one incident when I was around 20 and I'd been out drinking and Dad was working. I must have 'asked for it' as she got out her trusty Betterware brush with its aluminium handle and swung it at me but I stopped it hitting me and held on instead. She tugged at it but I held firm as I was not about to be hit. Eventually I let go with her still pulling and the handle clipped her above her eye. My dad worked overnight for an air freight company and I was dreading the next morning... I was sure she would tell him but she didn't. She told him the cupboard door swung at her. At the time I was relieved but with hindsight know that if she had told him then she would have to explain why the brush was out.
My dad died in 2010. She had cut me off from him by saying terrible things about my old greyhound as I'd told her that when the dog was pts I was going to have a Rottweiler pup> not as a replacement but I'd long wanted one and waited until tail docking was banned. I was waiting until the end of Maisys life because I didn't think it was fair to introduce a boisterous puppy into the life of an old greyhound. However the way she told it was that I'd said to Maisy 'when you're dead I'm getting a rotty' which my loving Dad who adored greyhounds got very emotional about and had called me whilst he had cancer and berated me before hanging up. She had succeeded in putting a wedge between us and the rift was never healed before he passed away. When he died she said nothing to me, or my Aunty (Dads sister) I found out from my sibling four days later when she called me and blurted out 'Dads dead' I was stunned and asked 'what?' And she replied 'Dad, he's dead' ... just like that. I was a mess at the time after being in a very abusive marriage for ten years. I'd moved away from my home town and pretty much burned my bridges. Any time I tried to tell my mum what was happening to me, she would say I'd 'made my bed' and I'd probably 'asked for it'. Thankfully in 2011 a former boyfriends brother came back into my life. The ex boyfriend had taken me to hospital more than once due to her violence but never stood up to her as she put the charm offensive on with any of my boyfriends. The brother of my former boyfriend was different. Feisty, oppositional, wise and gave me a voice to dump my violent husband and after meeting my mother who wouldn't let us in her smelly house and stood on the front being all nice to my new partner (as he was at the time) he had her sussed out. I also cut her from my life but allowed my children to see her while with their father (my former abuser) until she stepped over the line and was dripping her poison on my children. I had a realisation then that I couldn't trust her whatsoever and told her so and in her evil retaliation she said my dad wasn't my dad anyway. I don't think I can move on in my life while she is still alive. She will be 76 now and if I hear of her passing, I won't be going to her funeral. I want nothing from her. I assume my sibling will still be in contact with her as they were thick as thieves. I witnessed my sister lashing out at her oldest son in a shoe shop and asked why? Apparently he had 'asked for it' -and all I could see was history repeating itself. Her boys loved staying with me especially the older one as he got love and affection whereas my sister is a cold fish like my mother and only interested in material goods whereas I'm the opposite. Love my children, never hit them. They have boundaries they don't cross or have any desire to cross. They're so respectful and I think that's because I show them respect.
I will never become what my monster is (I mean my mother) I miss my Dad every day. I'm preparing to do a vulnerable witness interview regarding my abusive rapist of an ex husband. I need to get all the years of abuse out of my head so I can heal myself. I don't know how the Spry children got through their ordeal. They have untold inner strength. They're amazing. I do hope to receive counselling and have great support from 'witness support' and hope once all my demons are laid out, that I can marry the love of my life whom I met when I was just fifteen while dating his brother. He is my strength and I doubt I'd be here now if not for him. He saved my life or rather gave me a life.