Response to my i-report about being a teen mama baby...

WOW! I never in my life thought that lowly, lowly little me would rate their own TROLL!

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-75415#postComment

I can see this potentailly raging on for a while....

Why do I think 'adoption fog'?

Pinky

0

Something worth repeating

I can't help but go into white-noise mode when adoptees discuss their happy-go-lucky stories.  Sorry... but in my mind it all sounds like the teachers in those Charlie Brown cartoons.  [listen to 1:18 on "Be My Valentine, Charlie Brown"... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vQ6cGpiong

What I did notice, and do think bears much repeating is this simple statement: 

It sickens me to my stomach when I hear about the physical, mental and sexual abuse children are put through, whether or not they are with their biological parents or adopted parents. [comment from bonbonboots, (8th post), http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-75415#postComment]

The "adoption fog" you mention, I believe relates to the general public not wanting to accept abuse and neglect, in all it's miserable shades, existing in "loving adoptive homes".  The gross generalizations made by and about the adoption industry is just that:  GROSS.

Bonbon gets it...then ungets it...

She a definite flip-flopper on the issue, to steal a term of our politial times......child abuse bad by anyone.....adoptive parents not as capable of abuse than a teen age mom.

 

Personally, I think she just can't admit to me that she wants me to be the long-lost sister she always dreamed of. The one that CPS took away from teen mom first.

How do you think I feel?

Kerry said:
"I can't help but go into white-noise mode when adoptees discuss their happy-go-lucky stories."
OR AP's who ignore and hide the obvious dysfunction of their adoptive families when it is very clear that
their home is NOT happy-go-lucky?

Teddy says:
Take these for example:
The 9 year old from the family of 11 adopted and three biological gets up at 5am, takes  his bike and leaves (they
live in the country where they can hide their dysfunction), riding the country roads for hours and is found asleep with
his bike in a ditch 8 miles away?  Wouldn't you think there would be an investigation since the police were finally
called, along with many of their friends to find him?
There was NOTHING done!
OR AP's of a large adoptive family whose oldest is almost 18 (mental issues) and they buy him a trailer in a trailer-
court in town, where he lives by himself until he sets fire to it?  And then they get the help he needed all along and
find out he is schitzophrenic and must live on medication in a group home because he is very dangerous?  WTF?

And yet, many adoptive families continue to hide their dysfunction and are "left alone."  MY evilx was the point of no
return for us and it was all down hill from there, with everyone and their dog involved.  There has been some real
victories and progress, but only because OTHERS got involved with the help that was needed.

"I can be changed by what happens to me, I refuse to be reduced by it." M.A.
One Step Up From Bottom
Teddy

Denial

The examples you used prove how pride can be a bad thing.  [I think of the phrase, "Pride goes before the fall", so when I read such stories, I think:  how many need to fall before re-building begins?]

I see denial as a cancer... if a problem goes ignored, it will only grow and become bigger.  The domino effect  of  denied care and concern is causing such a huge mess, it's no wonder people will want to look at the carnage, but then turn away!

The question is:  how do we rid ourselves of the cancer that keeps problems with parenting alive?  You can't MAKE a person WANT to parent and  I don't think adoption solves the problem of "unfit parents".  In fact, I think it only broadens the scope of damage caused by dysfunctional families.  [Again, if a family is in denial of a problem, who's going to get hurt?]

If we can't prevent pregnancy, how can we promote better parenting-coping skills to those who need it most?  And how do we reach those people who don't WANT help?

Pound Pup Legacy