"It makes no difference"... REALLY?
I have stopped watching TV news because it's just far too depressing, so the only current-events I fall privy to are the ones in writing. [As if that's going to keep me away from the latest war and child trafficking updates.]
Today I have found a theme that makes me want to scream, and I'd like to share: Anjelina Jolie wants to convince the reading public, it makes no difference in the world if her children were birthed or adopted, because "Each of our children is unique and special to us," [she states this to the folks at People magazine, who got the photo-story because they "donated" 14 million bucks to the couple's favorite charity.... a foundation created by Pitt and Jolie that largely focuses on helping children around the world.]
And yet... when asked about the birth of their new twins:
When Knox and Vivienne finally made their eagerly anticipated debut, "I knew [that because they're twins] they would be premature, so when I saw they were big and screaming with healthy lungs, I was at peace," sighs Angelina, who underwent a C-section.
Brad, for his part, calls witnessing that particular miracle of childbirth an "absolutely heroic" process, and rhapsodizes that the sight of his newest progeny filled him with "an awe words fail to describe."
As for how they decided on the tots' monikers, "The name Vivienne came to us early, as if she named herself," explains Pitt. "She has always been Viv. And Marcheline is to honor Angie's mother [Marcheline Bertrand, who passed away in January of 2007]. Knox came soon after. It is a family name, my grandfather's. Léon is a classic French name."
According to Jolie, "Every time I see or say Vivienne's full name, I think of my mom. I look forward to the day she asks about her and I can tell her how special her grandmother was."
And while the twins can do little more right now than eat, sleep, burp and soil their diapers, the actor is convinced they're already displaying certain genetic traits.
"Viv is proving to resemble Ange in spirit, attitude and physicality. She is quite elegant like her mother," he kvells. "And Knox, a bit of me. He likes music like his dad. When he was born he looked like Putin!"
Can someone please explain how biology makes no difference in the heart of a parent? In terms of bonding and attachment, isn't a parent secretly longing to see a sense of resemblance in the face that looks back asking: "are you going to take good care of me?"
Maybe the parents see no difference between adoption and biology, but don't the children see one... and shouldn't that (identity issue) count for something?
Comments
Playing devils advocate...
Not that I am any sort of fan of them, nor have I read the article yet, so just going on what she is saying, each child is unique and special to them. I don't particularly take that the wrong way, it really could come from any parent.
I guess maybe she makes that statment because it seems everyone gets so obsessed with the "belly bump" and the bump watch or waiting for the delivery news, it truly is crazy, you can't pick up a magazine without a story about a celebrity expecting.
I think also, if they even read or hear the stories, many newcasters have said things like" Viv and Knox join sister Shiloh and the couples 3 other adopted children". To me that is obnoxious and is the media stating that biology is better and insinuating that those other kids are just kids in the house, when they have names, they have their own special personalities and gifts and histories.
Aboslutely agree bonding and attachment can be so much easier and is so much more natural when you give birth (although there are many who still struggle). I can't comment on whether it makes no difference as I have never given birth. I can say it seemed so natural and easy with our first who was 5 months old, it was harder and a struggle for our second s he was 13 months and had been through so much loss and was obviously stressed and grieving.
And I absolutely agree, their children will see a difference. How they handle their parenting, well none of us will truly know and I don't exactly think the media ever portrays the truth.