Playing Parental Alienation Syndrome
Submitted by Kerry on Sun, 2008-07-13 11:52.
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March 22, 2007
The Gregory Mantell Show: When divorce turns nasty and one parent tries to turn the kids against the other. Dr. Jayne Major, police officer Catherine MacWillie, and film director Shelli Ryan discuss parental alienation syndrome.
PAS features an obsessed parent who will make false claims/accusations of abuse against another parent, placing the child as the ultimate prize.
Although this show features PAS as a divorce-issue, is adoption not a formal divorce from an entire family? How many adoptees have been told they were not wanted or abused by their first-parents? How many adoptees felt like they had to choose the "good" parent over the "bad" parent?
How many adoptive parents exhibit PAS behavior, and how many children are growing-up with a warped sense of parental-love?
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My Warped Sense of Parental Love
My mother was the drama queen of PAS! And this young child just stood there, looking from one situation to another, wondering what was so wrong with her that she was not allowed to even have a decent thought about him... Notice that
it was my fault?
I was NEVER allowed to have ANY kind of relationship with my father after the age of 4; after my usefulness was outgrown
and my mother realized the damage that had been done.
This form of PAS, I find, was the one most horrifying abuse that I suffered for all these years.
"PAS features an obsessed parent who will make false claims/accusations of abuse against another parent, placing the child as the ultimate prize." So WHY didn't she want me as the prize instead of forcing me to eat in the other room and marrying
me off at 15 years old?
IN A WORLD OF WHY,
Teddy
Things are not always as they first read or seem
My Amother did a triple-whammy with me: she bad-mouthed everyone in her immediate family, and she taught me how to hate my afather's family, and last but not least, she bad mouthed my birth mother. She wanted me to believe she was all I needed.
When I posted this video (and related articles), I had the adoptee in-mind, as I believe in many cases, the AP's often make the adopted child feel as though a family-side has to be chosen once "Search and Reunion" becomes a family discussion. [I keep forgetting how certain adoption issues need to be explained to most readers]
The following statement (made by Teddy) in the thread, "Before the Escape", puts my thought in words, like I never could.
I am always greatly relieved when someone from the "other side" of our equation can see things as they really can be for many of us fostered/adoptees.