Pound Pup Legacy

I have tried the therapy-route several times over, only to find the single-most annoying aspect of "reaching-out" to a stranger is realizing the ones who claim to have extensive psychological training don't know dipsey-doodle about adoption, abandonment and abuse issues as a single-experience.  Most morons would classify one (Adoption) as an unrelated issue to the more commonly-seen and widely accepted PTSD or bi-polar diagnosis that quickly gets linked to trauma and abuse.

It used to infurate me how I would have to explain to "highly trained professionals" with deer-in-headight eyes, that trust for the adult adoptee is not at all the same as trust issues experienced by one with stress induced anxiety.  The relinquished child has many more wounds that need mending, and this needs to be widely accepted before real help can be provided to those seeking a better life for themselves.

I finally stopped seeing any of my therapists because I believe arguing facts with a book-trained person is an act in futility, serving no purpose other than gifting single-mindedness with payment I could not afford to waste.  I believe many of us have Safety Issues that keep getting crossed and lost because those who have lived a fairly protected life experience cannot begin to fathom what parental abandonment AND an unprotected childhood experience FEELS like.  Books and words cannot speak on behalf of the unthinkable, especially when it's a language of silent moans and groans. 

I've been saying it for years... the adoptee abused AFTER final adoption is not at all the same creature of habits as your regular abused child.  Yet, we're expected to respond to traditional treatments given to those with "mental illness".  The illness and disorders are within the system of neglect and the powers that keep letting harm happen to children.  Many of us are nothing more than the by-products of poorly made adult decisions.  Cause and Effect has become quite costly, yet little has been done to change the course of actions  as they relate to family protection and preservation.  Why not?  What good is removal if replacement is a different kind of danger that makes matters worse?

When becoming a member to PPL, I ask each member to describe his/her animal within.  The purpose behind this is to see how each human relates to and identifies with others, and how the nature of a particular being reflects his own ability to socialize and nurture another.  I have always been able to read a person's disposition through writing... so I find it really funny when a person writes one thing for others to read, but in private, tells me about their true spots and colors.  I'm never looking for an impressive essay.  I'm always looking for an honest look at one self.  Some of the things I read is amazingly brave and scary stuff.  It humbles me knowing so many seemingly closed people can be so open.

Trust needs to be established between two people before any positive growth can take place.  I have found, often, it's not what is said, but what is asked that matters more in the establishment of a better understanding of the ignored adult who believes RAD has taken-over. 

If nothing else in my life, I hope before I die, I will see a little check-box on a health form that asks:  "Were you put in foster care or adopted?"

Only then will I know we're finally moving in the right direction towards human repair.  The carnage has grown far too great for this ignorance/neglect to go on much longer.